Today, my daughter wore the writer’s uniform

Because she had no school, she stayed home all day. And didn’t wear pants.

I’m very annoyed with her. That’s my job, the not-wearing-of-pants.

And I’ve been doing very well with it, until she tried to take my spot. It’s one of the perks of the position, the not-wearing-of-pants, to compensate for the late nights, absent social life, and the weird looks from people who hear you write about werewolves and then sidle cautiously away from you.

Anyway, I must crush this attempt at usurpation. She’s gone to stay at a friend’s tonight, so I have plenty of time to plan. And tools. I have lots of tools.

I wonder if I could build a machine to Crazy Glue her pants onto her?

*sounds of drills and banging*

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